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As Bleak As Bones
At my shoulder the demons sit
their black leather eyes
forever hungry to cry my blood
I inhale and they lick my breath
freezing it with the chill of my own death
growling to suffocate my heart
and wither my soul to dust
Poisoned and bitter
seconds whirl into lost
but they bide their time
gloating as I watch
birthing my weakness
with unshakeable indifference
feasting on my tainted spirit
I cannot slay them
if I dive through their mirror
to gulp down shards of demon glass
even as I land on both feet
back they crawl with darker smiles
How they rage
rising up to claim me
as I hunch in their shadows
slipping beyond despair
drunk on their fury
such poor defeat
for a shell as bleak as bones
their black leather eyes
forever hungry to cry my blood
I inhale and they lick my breath
freezing it with the chill of my own death
growling to suffocate my heart
and wither my soul to dust
Poisoned and bitter
seconds whirl into lost
but they bide their time
gloating as I watch
birthing my weakness
with unshakeable indifference
feasting on my tainted spirit
I cannot slay them
if I dive through their mirror
to gulp down shards of demon glass
even as I land on both feet
back they crawl with darker smiles
How they rage
rising up to claim me
as I hunch in their shadows
slipping beyond despair
drunk on their fury
such poor defeat
for a shell as bleak as bones
Published 20th Feb 2010
| Edited 16th Jul 2012
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The author encourages honest critique.
Anonymous
20th Feb 2010 11:56pm
seems purposefully bleak, as though you were experimenting with darker themes, and is none the worse for that. The third line was an absolute smasher, and nothing could be easier to read. I remember you using the simile ‘as bleak as bones’ in a comment on my poem ‘Church’, so it was nice to see that one again; it’s a marvellous phrase.
21st Feb 2010 00:04am
You're very observant Jack - I've been running on dark for a little while as I wanted to balance things out. Thanks for that great comment.
21st Feb 2010 1:58am
21st Feb 2010 9:01am
Thanks - I got fascinated by those black leather eyes crying blood and this is what happened. Appreciate your comment.
22nd Feb 2010 8:17pm
My favourite bit has to be "they lick my breath / freezing it", and the enjambment here is used so well...
22nd Feb 2010 8:36pm
Jonathan, your feedback is greatly appreciated. Thanks for taking the time and trouble to leave a comment. I look forward to reading your work.
24th Feb 2010 1:20pm
Your use of imagery is fantastic! It's so vivid - I can actually picture it all in my head.
"black leather eyes" is my favourite, shows how the eyes are dark and completely unemetional. Superb poem Abra! :)
"black leather eyes" is my favourite, shows how the eyes are dark and completely unemetional. Superb poem Abra! :)
24th Feb 2010 5:18pm
