after all this time

after all this time
belongs my heart to you, it’s not mine
anymore, it’s all yours  
it always has been
 
the love omnipresent
like the fear i feel
can’t handle feeling safe
my heart sending an appeal
but the way to my brain’s been blocked  
highway congestion, veins clogged
 
“i’m only seventeen,
i don’t know anything
but i know i miss you“
don’t want to hurt your feelings
wanna find out first what i want -
or can handle -
but it feels impossible  
without your warm hugs
and tender gaze
making me forget the world.