HALFWAY THERE  (III) (2nd longer revision of original poem; 1-29-1997, East jetty of Flagship Hotel Pier, Galveston, TX)

     
     
i took a trolly          
down to the beach            
at the end of it s line          
walked out to          
the end of a jetty          
looked out over          
this vast gulf of mexicos          
seemingly endless horizon          
and longingly          
thought to myself          
with a heavy  inner sigh          
of momentary hopeful relief          
from what little s now left of me          
here at this point          
of my life s present          
long challenging      
ongoing journey          
in all it s worn out        
threadbare          
long wearied          
existential despair          
am i getting any nearer now          
just a little bit ever closer        
or perhaps only half way there        
to the temporal      
end of my line          
in my transcendent        
present journey s        
own inevitable    
physical being s    
currently failing    
three dimensional ride    
even despite my long    
experiential inner knowing    
that beyond the    
physical being    
of our mere    
human form alone    
in truth    
we each and all    
here in our present    
human lifetime s journeys    
shall eventually all come to know    
that our eternal souls and spirits    
greater ongoing journeys    
through this higher consciouness    
we are    
are endlessly never ending    
beyond our      
long held    
much too long stuck    
human species    
old  staunch firm    
tragically blind  fearful belief    
in the delusional concept    
of so called death and dying    
with or without any    
human ideological construct    
in or of    
one s deep or zealous    
chosen faith s beliefs    
in some ego driven    
existential  fear based myth    
in and of some    
so called final  
permanent end    
to and of    
our present journey s    
remaining    
illusory      
mortal time here    
rapidly    
running out on us all    
until it and we    
are finally    
gone for good    
forever more    
which brings me back    
full circle    
to my self reflective perception s    
sudden  brief    
spontaneous question  
that arose in me  
when i took a trolley  
down to the beach  
and finally made it out  
to the end  
of this jetty  
is the sea s    
far distant    
horizon line    
where it seamlessly    
kisses the sky    
it s very end    
or does it go on  
seemingly endless
forever
far further beyond    
it s visual appearance
alone
or is it more
here in this moment
right now    
in whatever way
it either may
or may not
symbolically
or premonitionally be
at least for me
perhaps  
still only  
halfway    
there