Where did the time go?

Sometimes the silence is so loud in my ears.. my mind can't stop thinking and I end up in tears.
Sometimes the solitude will drive me insane. ,
But there's no one around who isn't a pain.
Am I coming or going , or just standing still.
I might find the way if I just have the will.
I took a wrong turn somewhere on the way
And I got lost it seems,  what can I say ?
So im spinning my wheels and im going nowhere..
Just hanging out here,  cuz im not really all there.
And im searching for peace that comes from within ...
And asking forgiveness again and again .
God are u tired of hearing me yet ?
I know u forgive but you do not forget.
But I know you can see what's in my heart ..
An I know that u know that I'm not very smart.  
I miss my dad and I miss my son.
Angel and Beth and everyone.  
My sister in keeping w her normal fashion,
Lacks any kind of care or compassion. .
I really miss my beautiful niece.
She was the one thing that brought me some piece ..
But now I just sit here mostly alone .
Sometimes I walk to the nursing home,.
To see my poor momma, and sit for a spell.
Shes doing better but she'll never get well.
When your young u never know ..
Just how your life is going to go..
You never imagine how quickly things change,  and how one day things may seem so strange.  ..
So cherish your loved ones,
, make memories that last ,
 cuz darlin ill tell u that it goes by so fast.  !