Quitting?

I don't have to even
Think of an excuse.
I just say 'no'.
Don't want you tonight.

You just accept it.
And I suppose, ish.
That's fine with me.
But I think back.

Think back way before.
We ended like this.
When I was counting
Down minutes to you.

But now, you hurt.
Like a knife's twist.
I wish I could
Remember how we ended.

Still together in words,
Apart in all others.
We don't touch anymore.
A perfunctory cheek kiss.

As I walk outside.
I don't feel heartstrings
Tugging like they did.
When I left you.

It tears me up.
To know I'm quitting.
I don't even turn
For a last look.

You had my heart.
You saved my life.
You were my all,
Now what to do.

I need to go,
For my own sake.
But as I leave,
Feel my heart break.

I sigh, turn around, swallow my pride.
Hold his hand, sit by his side.
Promise him everything's gonna be ok.
Another broken promise, another long day.