deepundergroundpoetry.com
Pretty Vacant
He doesn’t
like
being touched
so he
watches
me
intently
through the
window
his breath
heavy
&
ragged
instructing me
to do
this & that
like some
pay per view
cheap
whore
he could find
downtown
on the
corner street
oblivious
to the beauty
of our
bond
built
over years.
like
being touched
so he
watches
me
intently
through the
window
his breath
heavy
&
ragged
instructing me
to do
this & that
like some
pay per view
cheap
whore
he could find
downtown
on the
corner street
oblivious
to the beauty
of our
bond
built
over years.
Published 5th Jan 2024
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likes 5
reading list entries 0
comments 5
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5th Jan 2024 11:57am
The eyes watch for sure but sometimes you have to break the glass. Really great writing.
5th Jan 2024 12:38pm
This poem is raw and evocative, delving into the complexities of a relationship characterized by distance and unrealized connections. Live images viewed through a window add a sense of voyeurism and separation from true intimacy. Using provocative language and comparisons emphasizes your feelings of being objectified and belittled. The contrast between the other person's superficial desires and the deep emotional connection you crave is striking. Your words convey a sense of vulnerability and frustration, capturing the essence of a complicated and unsatisfying relationship. Well done on expressing these intense emotions with such clarity.
5th Jan 2024 2:34pm
a strange poem but gritty and stark. i think what makes it so good is it's realistic almost like something from a movie. i like it.
5th Jan 2024 5:58pm
1st Feb 2024 12:38pm
A fantastic piece of writing. Well written and explicit with detail. Nice flow.
