Guilt, Fear And Loathing

I think it's almost time
To drop everything
And take that giant step
That takes me away from here
There's no happiness
In my life and times
Only angry words
And hateful states
It just makes me feel like
Today's the day
I have everything I need
To take me away
So what is holding me back?
Fear?
Guilt?
Maybe even hope?
I don't know why I'm thinking like this
It's an anguished thought in my head
But it's pulling me in