deepundergroundpoetry.com
This is idk
This is not a poem
This is a way to put into words the pain I run from
The heartache I feel when a memory comes crashing down
Unwanted unexpectedly
It happened two years ago but everyday it creeps into my mind to punish me
will it ever lessen?
will the pain ease ?
Will the visions of you laying there bloated in the hospital bed broken inside suffering
unmoving but alive
You where fighting I was slowly dying
Could you hear my cries?
my silent begging to take me wherever you ended up?
The monitor I watched for ten days Is etched in my memory
Every beep it made I clung to
every breath you took I matched
grasping your hand begging God to let me keep you and he did
There’s no greater joy than that
Just need to erase my mind somehow reset
adjust to the happy broken ( like the car that crumbled you) fake brave mom you see
This is a way to put into words the pain I run from
The heartache I feel when a memory comes crashing down
Unwanted unexpectedly
It happened two years ago but everyday it creeps into my mind to punish me
will it ever lessen?
will the pain ease ?
Will the visions of you laying there bloated in the hospital bed broken inside suffering
unmoving but alive
You where fighting I was slowly dying
Could you hear my cries?
my silent begging to take me wherever you ended up?
The monitor I watched for ten days Is etched in my memory
Every beep it made I clung to
every breath you took I matched
grasping your hand begging God to let me keep you and he did
There’s no greater joy than that
Just need to erase my mind somehow reset
adjust to the happy broken ( like the car that crumbled you) fake brave mom you see
Published 3rd Oct 2023
Author's Note
I haven’t reread this at all I don’t even want to . I wrote it one morning I just felt like I needed to write something about it but it’s very hard to write it or relive it. So I’ll add to this because I just need it where people can see it (people that don’t know me) and I can add when I want to it maybe it’ll help me get it out somehow
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3rd Oct 2023 10:46am
3rd Oct 2023 10:50am
Yeah this is a lot for me but I been putting off talking or thinking about it lately and needed an out. Ty for reading xo
