why do I have sight

the light goes out.
 
I've stumbled thru worse  
now and again.
living in sin  
a concept so dated  
like what we never did.
Never doubt that sling,
I'm flinging my feelings
at your boots;
I won't lick 'em but  
they're wet.
Forgetting would be nice.
To breathe that crisp,
vampiric frost and nip the  
dark bud again.
 
I lose myself within the stones
you never even picked up.
 
Consequences shame me,
like everyone can see  
that paper thin wall is ripping
like pantyhose I never even bought!
I didn't have chances because I didn't take them.
Breaking my options and  
force folding the scripts,
I have no quips I am  
still.

Panting my prayers  
and palming the slick walls,
climbing finger after finger,

I see her face.
Unmarked and unsnarled,
it surrounds me.  
Steals the life from between my ribs  
and laughs cruel gunsmoke kisses.
They hit me hard, and my resolve buckles,
my knuckles raw from the fall.
I beat myself up with jagged cliffs  
mad at a ghost  
for charges of possession.
Jealousy obsession.
Fits of rage  
and other displays of hostility,
certifiable loss of dignity.
 
The pebbles are so gritty,  
dirt in my nails and nails in my hands  
I'm burning up, fevered with these dreams