alaska

night show with light snow,
a capped mountain with lioness wars
waged between  our legs.
i draw back covered in thorns,
they break the skin,
and freckle me with blood.

a singular bloody sword,
an unnecessary dirty word,

alaska

how i've dreamed, how i've remembered.
all that passion,
in books and tv, my childhood weeps
for all i've never seen.
it's not something that can be viewed. it must be felt.
it's cats, and snow. it's harbors, and fishes.
it's my innermost tingling wish,
my unknown lush responsibility
to show that little girl inside that life is worth living.
that the cold isn't scary,
and you never need to hide.
go out, knowing that at dawn we ride.
i shall be the bridge connecting our souls.
some ethereal ethernet of ones and zeros,
somehow, meaningfully, bringing us together
if only to pass by, and hold onto the feeling
of the speed of light.
it's a lot to take in, so we soak in the bath,
and pretend this isn't dangerous for both of us.
Maybe it's  the reason i've always felt different.
special cloaking device to disguise me
from the motherboard circus-y
belldam murder-y
mutilating our wires;
fail,
a power outrage,
unsettled score i cannot divide,
it's been eons
and now i am alone again.
i cannot remember.
i cannot care.
i am nothing
once more.