my last phase

ohh..beloved! this is my last letter
I hope you will not ignore it
just read it and remember me
forever and ever and ever.
You know as the time draws near
I am silent every day now in dark
closed rooms. I just write the feelings
of my heart on white papers
maybe sometimes even by mistake
you would read my pains. which
I write every day before sleeping.
Nobody is here around me
and now I don't feel like doing anything new
I wish to sleep in someone's lap and want
to find peace, and in this hope,
every day I look at the clouds
through the windows. The time has come
to leave the world at a young age,
there was a lot to do but now
time is running out,
I wish you could understand my feelings,
would not leave me after hearing about my illness.