The Apology

I wrapped myself in melancholy, as I wore a mental hue a shade of red. A faded red rose petal plucked from the garden of young love. I keep it pressed next to my heart as a memorial of what once was; a tangible metaphor of a dove...loves sacred animal, soaring high within the catacombs of my psyche sitting under starless skies skating on the edge of a crimson red razor blade balancing between reality and fiction wondering if you just loved me or were truly in love with me is my daily affliction.
I often reach deep within my soul to collect the scattered and sharp pieces of you that I can no longer touch physically yet the mystery of my misery is I can still inhale your exhale, i can still taste your smell, I can still see you with my eyes closed as if god photoshopped your face onto my retina as a form of karma for my past sins. Please subtract the pain I’ll carry the guilt if you minus the blame. A simple equation for me as a mere mortal loving a goddess like you.   For me to turn a blind eye to the undeserving love that you tried to give is nothing more than betrayal but if you allow me to touch your heart and soul again I promise I will interpret, understand and feel every word you say like I’m reading braille.  Allow me to once again vibrate on your wavelength as you stir my pool of love kinetically. Allow us to become one again. Not just physically emotionally and mentally but telepathically.  Let me feel your thoughts and taste your actions.  Allow our love to surpass the past and be for ever lasting. Damn confidence and pride, things I now choose to hide look inside and see the boy hiding within the man in me, the innocence in my ignorance.  Vibe and follow me but my last request...can you please accept my apology?