Pressure

You cut me deep.  
And no I’m not gonna go on and on about why men ain’t shit or why it’s so hard for me to keep  
Somebody who really cares and values me  
I know what it’s like to have to finally take accountability  
To finally release that pressure, that burden off of me.  
I just find it sickening, how I let you dog me out
And convince me it was a prophecy.  
Prophets seem, to always know the truth except the truth about a beam poking straight through the seams of their own damn reality  
At least that’s the case for the ones who say  
I’m a prophet, or at least that’s what they call me  
It’s obscene how far I let this shit degrade me  
Oh that’s just how he is, you know… his trauma and the demons he’s fighting  
Whole time the demon is smiling, yeah  
You got me.  
But let’s talk about me, Miss I don’t want my kids to see the shit I witnessed so let’s put them through a whole different meaning of generational toxicity  
Yeah at least my baby daddy don’t hit me
He just convinced me it’s okay for other women to fill his hole whiles he’s drilling those hoes  
We just click, she really gets me  
That’s my friend, it’s a lot more easy  
To open up to a woman who doesn’t judge me  
Nobody gets me
The world is against me  
 
I was clingy. Holding on to the only man able to impregnate me, yeah that’s what I believed. It took me three years to conceive  
As far as I could see, this was destiny.  
Why else would God allow me to carry his baby?  
I could learn to forgive and that would make me a better woman  
A stronger woman
A down ass woman.
 
A damn clown. Pressure on me.  
 
Now I have two babies and a plane ticket back to the roots. A pending divorce and a lease with him to feel free to choose who to screw in peace  
 
Pressure. Yeah. That pressure to keep it real was all me. I gave away everything in me, so when I say I’m in these streets understand there’s no more love in me to apply pressure for more than what it took for him to cum in me.  
 
45 seconds is how long you have to impress me.