Straight from the heart to the page.

Written here as it came out.
**
I could've posted an older poem
but I had to get this off my chest
I'm not sure what's going on right now
I'm somewhere between bliss and hair pulling distressed.
Once upon a time..well, maybe recently
I loved a girl who was such a mystery
who had no clue as to how she felt towards me.
I don't plot blame on her head.
She's been made someone of careful tread.
But god damn it's tough.She talks these vague blurs
and I pick up signals she'd like me to be hers...
but othertimes I'm not so sure
and she draws back, all demure.
So honestly, it's a crazy whirlwind thing.
I've sung to the brokenheart songs when I thought it was all over.Wanted to be anything but sober.
I've sung a song called 'Joy' when I felt it was leading to all I hoped for,one day.It was in the snuggled hug and the station head lay.
Somedays I just wish for an answer to put myself at rest
close the iron chest -of 'W' questions all good journalists ask.
Maybe a riddle this rough isn't 'meant to be' , but then again I've never been a big believer in destiny.
I'd settle even and I can't conceive it ,that I'll want it so bad but my mind is unsettled and would rest somehow glad..if you told me no,unlikely to ever happen.Because then I could shed some tears,dive into poetic misery and then come out clear sighted aware of beauty.I thought I already had done that dance.
I'm not angry or upset.
I think the world of you,
I'm just ranting because I'm confused about my muse.