Untitled poem#2

Life through the eyes and life through the brain is not the same
step into my mind where i can't take the pain, i'm a boozer
And in my mind where i can't take the shame, of being a loser
sometimes i feel peace from the heavens above
cry myself to sleep but i realize there's more then one definition of love
use my mind to write so i guess my thoughts come in handy
Do nothing wrong but still these kids can't stand me
And know this, because i keep my composure
like Michael Corleone when he handles business for his family,
In public i put my smile on and pretend that my life is fine and dandy
never needed counselors, just someone who could understand me
And that feeling of pain and not being accepted
in the room, the only one that's feeling the same is my reflection
I held myself back from a change and i regret it
but you can't really come back from that first impression
i love you, but its hard for my words to express it
I just hope i can touch your heart and send you this message
Find something you love to do and use it to your advantage

Thoughts of suicide, consume your mind, but your afraid
because you really don't want to die, just want to escape
I can help you find that source of ease that you haven't found yet
do something you love and use it as an outlet
I speak the truth i don't play around
keep yourself occupied, because an idle mind, is the Devil's playground
but the agony of depression and the pain of aggression
prevents a progression of trying to find a way for this pain to lesson
felt alone trapped like no ones actually there
but got the courage to go to my parents and now i know they actually care
And i know some parents would tell you to grow up and be a man
It's not your fault their not in the same frame of mind to understand
so turn to the people like you to lend a hand
see that's what i did and now no more nightmares im always dreaming
and i learned that my friends werent friends, just disguised demons

Suffered from this anxiety since the age of 3
i want to save you all because you all saved me
And i know against these people your helpless when you cry for help
their the reason why your mind is hell
and the reason why, your forced to fight, the demon inside yourself
i understand because that's also me, so saving your mind is my mission
i will talk if you want to talk, but i will also listen
because i know that feeling of pain when you start to believe all the hurt
Questions spark in the brain, Am i the cause of burdens?
repetitive, every visions the same, on a boat as i recede from the surface
feeling worthless, getting ready to dive head first
but realize that the point of life is livin and my decision defeats the whole purpose
So go on through your days and just know that you are perfect.