MY SURRENDER

I have a vulnerability of surrendering in trust, surrendering to trust.
My surrender becomes conscious as a love only reserved for intimate trust.

It terrifies me, this passionate journey into intimacy. It is overwhelming. Very emotional.
I want to grasp it, conquer it, get lost in it, feel it, embrace it, let myself be immersed in it.
Although I still cower from it, the authenticity of it all, don’t you?

I love the intoxicating addiction, somewhat afraid to surrender to it, its seduction is what I’m afraid of losing. I love the seduction of passion and the passion of seduction. To ask me to let go and to feel the loss of something I’ve held on to for years seems intimidating and inhumanly cruel.

It's a circle of discord.
I almost love it.
I do love it.
I'm its prisoner.

In the midst of my surrender I vow to take your hand. I willingly follow your lead when my heart becomes sensitive and vulnerable. For your love you give unconditionally and reserve for authentic trust. The authenticity of my surrendered trust is dependent on the authenticity of your faithful trust.

It’s a two way street of kindness, courtesy and courage.
Tenacity and audaciousness.
Respect and compassion.
Heart and healing.
Love and light.

Can we have another conversation?
I implore a second chance.