Death is calling

I feel closer to death. Closer than i've ever been. I don't want to take another breath. My soul's journey has reached its end. I am going to give up finally, My kind has died long ago. My love is not worth anything, I believe it now and so I'll go. Why was it my fate to live this shell of a life. Why was I born to suffer so alone, crying myself to sleep at night. I don't want to live anymore, and no ones knows my time is running out, everyone will pretend thy loved me when I'm gone but not a single tear will come out. One day I will figure out when and how I end my life, but hopefully I die before that, hopefully instantly though like a car accident or a lightning strike. 35 years of pain has brought me to my knees and I dont want to see 36......