Lipstick Valentine

Lipstick Valentine

    “Madam, would you please put more milk in my coffee?”
     “Of course.”
     “But if you will, pour some out first. I like my coffee well milked.”
     “That is a funny way of putting it. But I don’t mind.”
     “Very nice. Are there any perks to the usual Barista girl services here?”
     “I can’t imagine what you mean. Actually, I can but prefer not to.”
     “Well let me jog your imagination. Would you be so kind as to leave a lipstick print on my cup? I will compensate you with a generous tip.”
     “Not sure I feel comfortable with monetary compensation. That makes me feel like I am selling my femininity for a pence. Oops, the sound of the coin word has certain unintended phallic connotations. Well, maybe it was intentional.”
     “You are sounding like Miranda of the Bard’s “The Tempest” who has been too long in the company of the monstrous Caliban but Is head over heels in love when out of the storm a ship brings not one man but several including Ferdinand who becomes the apple of her eye.”
     “My aren’t we presumptuous? No sooner am I bandying innuendo than we are ready for marriage. If you were any bolder you’d have me in bed. But surely you are a gentleman for whom courtship is the prerequisite for a romance of the nuptial sort.”
     “Given the variables of any romance, the more certain algebra is to eschew the niceties in favor of prenuptial revelry.”
     “Methinks you have taken a road too often traveled that leads to a marriage as fallen as it is short-lived.”
     “Given the odds in this vast universe why not throw the dice come what may?”
     “Here is your cup with my lipstick embossed like a valentine. If after the passage of a year you are still of a mind to marry me we will come to terms. But if this is a passing fancy your absence will be my answer. Remember, you must bring the cup with my lip gloss and hope that I am not taken. Surely if I am worth it, you will agree to these terms.”
     “You drive a hard bargain. But yours is an offer not to be refused. In the meantime, I will restrain my amorous intentions toward you until the designated time.”
     “Dare not speak to me of our arrangement in the interim. My role is as your Barista until then. But remember this above all. You must not flirt with the women here. If I catch you the deal is off”
     “I will wear my suit of armor in the presence of temptation.”
     “I will hold you to it. I would suggest a codpiece as well for insurance.”