Less Human than Human

Everyday I wake up a little tireder than before.
My heart and my mind are once again waging their endless war.
 
My heart is full of hope towards what the new day may bring.
But my mind reminds me that nothing out there is ever worth anything.
 
No doubt there are things I love, myself not included.
The demons always present even if temporarily eluded.
 
I've lost all control, though I swear it wasn't willingly.
You preach on this and you preach on that but it's this life that is killing me.
 
I lay down and let them walk on me, though I'm not an apathetic man.
Mute your words of encouragement or lose your sympathetic hand.
 
Sometimes I do stand up, just to see the fear in their eyes.
I am a giant constructed out of anger and filled to the brim with despise.
 
Don't assume that I long for your life, don't ever make that mistake.
If I were to put my foot down this entire world would shake.
 
Far from incapable I am somewhat intelligent.
Riches or social status have never been relevant.
 
I strangled all my hopes in hopes of killing fear.
Until I see Hell's flames I'll shed not a single tear.
 
The masses chose the light so I crept into the dark.
The fountain of life is all yours, I'd rather swim with the sharks.
 
I'm disgusted with how people lie, how they cheat, and how they abuse.
I'll be much more or much less, but human I refuse.