Ironically Nostalgic

Love eludes me,
That which used me up,
Consumed my energy,
Mentally, physically, spiritually,
Devoured my sense of self,
Love that had me spent,
Got me down,
Made my stomach churn,
Rendered me useless,
And mute,
And deaf to good sense,
And blind to other beauty,
Love that incapacitated me absolutely.

Yet I am nostalgic for that love,
The growing pains were worth it,
For it made me feel,
It sent me down into the depths,
It ripped me open and challenged who I was,
And most of all,
It gave me purpose,
Giving all of myself to another,
One I cared for more than all of life's treasures.