my panic room

so last night I triggered my own self
may have gotten too excited
then I saw these two monsters called anxiety and depression
these I was welcoming my guests

everything was so silent
as I saw them going over me there so tall
I couldn't control them or keep them away
I sat up I was breathing in and out

they were crushing me
sinking me lower
I was breathing and rocking back and forth
holding on to my pillow

as I cried wanting desperately to be normal
where a little excitement wouldn't affect me negatively
my mind doesn't stop overthinking
I see different pictures in my head

usually, I'm like come on let's get this over with
I imagine they smile at me
for anyone that makes fun of me
when its ur turn you won't be laughing

I don't wish it on anyone
it's hard to cope to manage
but at the same time, these monster have never left me
when others decide to not deal with me

I am not a monster or a sick person
I'm still myself like I always been
towards the end, I say I know you had your fun
then they go away and disappear