Riptide

There's a riptide coming to take me.
No religion can hide me from this.
Do I cross the sea,
or go across my wrists?
My only thought is who will save me.
Bitterness is such a bliss.
 
I try to keep my eyes looking forward.
But they keep fixing on the past.
When everything starts go good.
It always leads me right back, to black.
 
There is a wildfire is my eyes.
And my heart has caught a flame.
I'm addicted to the pain.  
I dont want to,
But my mind just loves the games.
 
There's a crack inside my soul.
And I just dont feel the same.
I'm addicted to the shame.
I dont want to,
But my mind just loves the games.
My mind just loves the games.
 
This tide has risen intensely.
I feel the water hit my skin.
its time sink.
I'm too tired to swim.
My only thought is who would save me.
Bitterness is such a bliss.
 
There is a wildfire is my eyes.
And my heart has caught a flame.
I'm addicted to the pain.  
I dont want to,
But my mind just loves the games.
 
There's a crack inside my soul.
And I just dont feel the same.
I'm addicted to the shame.
I dont want to,
But my mind just loves the games.
My mind just loves the games.
My mind just loves the.
 
I've been trying to get back inside my own head.
I cant escape it,  
and it wont stop until I'm dead.
I'll try to run it off,  
But it keeps me off the tracks.
Dont look back.
Dont look back.
 
So let the riptide come and take me.
I haven't much left to stand.
Its crossed my mind a thousand times.
Then they fall apart in my hands.
The hours nearly over.
Even though it seems like ten.
My hands are shaking badly,
cause I'm writing this by pen.
So I'll quit the sore excuses.
These monsters beside the bed.
Were not the ones that hurt me.
It was my own voice in my head.