Fevered

 

~

Here is where the journey ends
amid the lingering visions of nightmares
laced with strong words
      that scroll across a screen

my heart deflates
   with the heave of a sigh
and I know that the end has come at last
    to the vicious pattern
that has always made up my past
and future

the knife rests as it always does
sharp and polished
ready to slice through a history
   that breeds thoughts, like bubbles
that explode all at once
into chaotic noise
an indistinguishable voice,  humming

there is a methodology
   to the madness created
a trial and error, refined and revisited
effectiveness measured with the rising
       of mercury

I grew fevered with love
        and sick with heartache
ready to plunge the dagger deep

yet, I am always rescued by an alarm
that restores rationality, sanity

in the end it is pride
that always keeps me alive

I may have been laughed at
teased and taunted
    beaten and branded

but I will not lose this life yet

~