guiltSQUAREshameONEregret

I lie my body on a concrete floor for three days.    
I just put air into it.      
sometimes I'm conscious of that.      
my body has 3 positions it can use      
when the numbness gets unbearable.      
there is a permanent strip light      
on above where I lie.      
I think I am guessing pretty well      
when it's night/day.      
my body is a metronome.      
when I piss I piss dark      
into a steel toilet that's seen      
a gruesome amount of shrivelled dicks.  
lying I always have a hand or forearm      
across my eyes so the camera      
doesn't see what my eyes are doing.      
late on the third day my body unscrunches
starts walking the 3 and a half steps      
from cream wall to blue door      
and back. the body's muscle memory      
not returning as I'd thought.      
arms and hands at my sides swinging slightly.  
eyes still scrunching then sagging.      
no finches left in this body      
I say      
this body is breaking      
no it's imitating chirps      
it's sign language      
I say