"The Changed Girl Is Ranting - Part Four"

Through time and time agian I find the love of another so foul and disgrace it from my own mind(s). But then this girl of simple standards and broken homes, a plain jane from on the outside until I take a deeper look inside the mind of another writer, another hopelesss romantic, another lone soul waiting to be found. And although I never told her of my moments of darkness or my unfathamable torments I hardly ever knew she does accept me and make me feel whole though I know I may never be so. She gives me what I never could have and never did recieve though I gave it quite often, so often in fact that it got beaten with rejection and therefore making me hate myself and everything I've ever had. Harmony on the highest level I never thought I would meet such a creature that likes the things I dislike in myself, one that stares at me from across the room to see things I cannot see, one that at the sound of her voice I fall in love with her all over again. And although I sometimes fear she might leave I know that she won't and I am just being absolutley paranoid, a paranoid angel she calls me. The deal of making a national statement in my head of loving someone for the first time in an awful long time, it made me smile, my heart pumping white light into the black tubes in my body. I realize that I do love the woman I so seem to see everyday and cry when at night she is not with me. I'm rambling, I love her. And that is all there is to say.