deepundergroundpoetry.com
Nirvana
Drinking in your passion
Is nirvana
Like a piranha
I wanna devour you
Shower you
With ecstasy
Your sexiness
Begs my sperm exodus
With an effortless
Flow of words
Your love infers
Loss I incur
When I’m without you
I don’t doubt you
Love me too
I’m just confessin’
My love for you
Your flesh
Is best
When undressed
Caressed
And tasted
Your love
Is not wasted
On me
It’s clear to me
That ecstasy
Exists for me
Because you generously
Bestow upon me
My fantasy
Simply
Because you allow me
To be
Engulfed in your Nirvana
Is nirvana
Like a piranha
I wanna devour you
Shower you
With ecstasy
Your sexiness
Begs my sperm exodus
With an effortless
Flow of words
Your love infers
Loss I incur
When I’m without you
I don’t doubt you
Love me too
I’m just confessin’
My love for you
Your flesh
Is best
When undressed
Caressed
And tasted
Your love
Is not wasted
On me
It’s clear to me
That ecstasy
Exists for me
Because you generously
Bestow upon me
My fantasy
Simply
Because you allow me
To be
Engulfed in your Nirvana
Published 21st Apr 2018
| Edited 22nd Apr 2018
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
likes 6
reading list entries 1
comments 16
reads 693
Commenting Preference:
The author encourages honest critique.
21st Apr 2018 10:01pm
21st Apr 2018 10:05pm
22nd Apr 2018 7:53am
Another favourite line:
"Your sexiness
Begs my sperm exodus" (more elegant way of saying "you make me come")
"Your sexiness
Begs my sperm exodus" (more elegant way of saying "you make me come")
21st Apr 2018 10:15pm
22nd Apr 2018 1:08am
22nd Apr 2018 00:30am
22nd Apr 2018 1:12am
22nd Apr 2018 1:44am
22nd Apr 2018 1:46am
22nd Apr 2018 2:12pm
Yes
this excess is best undressed
sacred, naked
free to be
Thanks for your rhythmic, stirring sexcapade!
I do have two word choice questions:
Do you mean lost I incur or did you intend it to be the loss I incur?
Do you mean that ecstasy exists or exist?
I'm asking because you're skills are so strong but as a reader both word selections stood out to me...
You're talented. I'll be reading more!!!
this excess is best undressed
sacred, naked
free to be
Thanks for your rhythmic, stirring sexcapade!
I do have two word choice questions:
Do you mean lost I incur or did you intend it to be the loss I incur?
Do you mean that ecstasy exists or exist?
I'm asking because you're skills are so strong but as a reader both word selections stood out to me...
You're talented. I'll be reading more!!!
22nd Apr 2018 2:25pm
Thanks for the corrections! I’m not the best at grammar sometimes! Been outta school for a while🤦🏾♂️🤣
22nd Apr 2018 2:32pm
I'd say your language, grammar, and word skills are most excellent. I was just curious as every word in that poem seems placed like the perfect piece to fit its counterparts. I hope you know I asked with respect toward your prowess.
22nd Apr 2018 2:37pm
No problem! I’m not sensitive I appreciate the feedback. I’m a novice at this I just write of the top pretty quickly most of the time so sometimes I don’t put it down grammorically (if that’s a word?) properly.
22nd Apr 2018 2:41pm
26th Jun 2021 11:48pm
27th Jun 2021 1:37pm
