A SUBTLE REBECOMING  DONE   (II) - (new revision) - (12-3-17, Cathedral City (‘Cove’), California)

     
in letting go      
of this      
i do not      
dare suppress      
its not so      
silent call      
to heed      
some lingering need      
to step outside      
the sticky      
boundaries      
of its mess      
of that      
of this      
of it  itself      
to release      
set free      
impart  apart      
to take      
the open      
unknown path      
which longs      
to lead      
its unmarked way      
to fall into      
some burning night      
of wasted      
broken      
days undone      
far off  away      
from all      
complacent commonness      
of wearied      
worn out      
mother tongues      
long decayed      
now void control      
laid forth      
laid down      
from      
day one on      
so long ago  
for me alone      
it seemed      
at first      
or so      
i felt      
and thought      
for years      
yet not so      
much  no more      
especially here tonight      
where ive now come  
again  
to strive to  
move beyond  
its distal  toxic  
inner ghosts  
still lingering  
subconsciously  
crippling  
haunted spells  
oppressively  
stubborn hold  
as i now      
come      
in silent      
swollen joy      
to readily defy      
though still      
i pause      
to ask myself      
should i      
cling on      
or only try      
to not      
cling on      
at all      
to hope for      
more or less      
of this      
of that      
of it  itself      
or should i      
perhaps      
abandon nest  again      
though mine      
this time around      
to separate myself      
at last      
away from      
all i know      
and dont      
yet still somehow      
remain detached      
just far enough      
away      
in reach      
in grasp      
from meanings      
lost desires defenses      
pre relinquished      
inner quest      
with or without      
further risk      
of necessary consequence      
in trying      
to define      
or find      
the missing key      
to reversing      
so much prolific      
defective imperfection      
which  in truth      
i do not      
even care      
to think about  
here now  
to reflect upon  
to seek    
and try    
to analyze  
nor further  
understand  
beyond its fleeting  
echo briefly  
risen here  
nor waste    
another moment    
to question      
anymore    
beyond      
this ruptured vacancy      
of random        
fractured      
empty words      
let go  gone      
to come      
and go      
this way      
no more      
with or without      
fevered eyes      
like these      
my own again      
till free      
once more      
to rise      
and fall      
to live above      
my own strange      
restless dreams      
to release around      
below  within      
between them      
each and all      
though not by      
choice      
of will alone      
but rather by      
some deeper        
innate        
inner mystic      
intuitive sirens call      
from which these      
flailing        
channeled lines      
and i  together      
here as one      
so mysteriously      
now succumb      
in knowing acceptance      
to completely      
surrender      
to peculiarly      
unfold      
with silent      
graceful ease      
gently out into  
our very own      
inevitable  new
consciously
manifested      
subtle      
rebecoming      
done