Fixation

I must have a fixation with feeling frustration, it's like I'm drawn to it like a fly to defecation. I have these expectations that no one ever meets, and so I lose my patience and my mind begins to leak, causing devastation with the havoc that I wreak. I lose sight of my destination, and feel I'm becoming weak. I might need a vacation, before the pain reaches its peak. I try to disconnect, but everything is intertwined. I'm feeling the effects from the horrors of my mind. I just want to eject the past, and leave it all behind. But all I do is whine, I let it take up all my time, giving into swine, letting them infect what's mine, but giving up is not an option so I know that I'll be fine. I don't care if they're unkind, I just don't want their perceptions fucking up what I aligned for myself and my direction. But I've come to find that they have power 'cause I let them, and so I shouldn't sweat them, if I don't let them penetrate my mind they're not a threat then. They don't really know what I'm about, why should I care? I need to let go of the doubt, and not be scared. I'm well aware that life is unfair, full of despair, but I'm stuck here when I should be way over there. I don't need to compare, or care what they declare. Who says life isn't an open source software? Deviate if you dare, I'd rather create than let the hate make me irate, so I'd better prepare. I know I try to be strong, then fall flat on my face, but that's just the case with the human race, so I'll have to endure it 'til I'm out of this place.