Quitting on unrequited love

I've gotten to the point where I crave defeat
So I can hurdle up in my hole and retreat
I know the two of us ain't soul bound
But I just want one night out on the town
One disappointing night
To make things right
Right in my mind
To recognize she's not of my kind
So I would know
The truth of how things go
How she really isn't the one for me
How for her my heart doesn't need to bleed

Oh my god, Logan
Stiring in my heart again
Oh my god, Mackenzie
I'm going through a frenzy
Oh my god, Mackenzie

Or as she'd prefer, I'd call her a he
but that's not what I'd want her to be
And I know if she'd be the one to hear
This from me straight to her ears
She'd think I didn't give a dam shit
about her or her well being
She wouldn't see I'm still well meaning
But I've seen we've already split

And that we've yet to see one another
Cause neither of us can seem to bother
I'll die with her on my mind
Still, though I wish I could rewind
She was not one of my kind