The nightmare that haunts me

Damn, I just lost my best friend,  My girl.
To a guy that promise her he was going to be in her world.
Man, it's crazy she was my little baby.
Did everything for her and I always treated her like a lady.
I had to realize that no matter the good I did and the great guy that I have been she would have never picked me in the first place, because she has history with the other guy.
Every day and every night, I think about what we could have been doing, five or six years ago we could have had a beautiful son or a daughter.
The situation I'm looking at I always end up heartbroken or getting no love got me thinking about the old days, but I really wanted her to stay.
Now, I'm spazzing out and my emotions is taking control, if I do something wrong hope everyone don't take it to serious my heart just got broke. Someone tell me why the ones that do the most dirt get more love thrown at them. The situation that haunts me the most is she giving more love to him. See these generation of women are stupid, when I say that word I use it loosely. They rather stay down for a no good guy who have kids or don't, but the dudes be dogging them. When a good guy comes in they get fucked, because they heart is so twisted with the bad guy. I'm losing service I can't get through on my landline. guys are no different it's the same thing vice versa. I told her everything she needed to hear, plus  I always showed her. I wish she would have gave it to me, love, care, satisfaction, and the attention. Now look at me, I can't get nothing like the service is out of commission. Lord knows how much I loved that girl, my heart got too attached and I really wanted her to come in my world, but her heart got detach. Lord help me to ease my mind, I can't stop thinking about her giving him what I deserve. I can't talk to her, because she talk about him and that really get on my nerves. We had some much in common I thought we would never broke loose. When dude came back in full, SHE looked at me and just chuck the deuces. Its hurts when it went down, because  I always prayed that God send me someone that we have the same interest. I deserve it all after I was promise it. This puts me in a bad state of mind dealing with allot of different emotions. I'm tired of not being chosen. The stuff that I'm not getting is haunting me the love, care, affection, attention, TLC, and everything that she is giving him  is going to haunt me for the rest of my life. I never had someone that was crazy about me like she is insane about him. Honestly, the way someone going to crazy about me is when I'm dead six feet under. Than its too late.