Black moth

I caught the scent of a purple light
and got the urdge to fly.
The though of being in its glim might trigger my demise was in me.
But empty i felt and that purple skin felt filling so im hurting myself each time im in its reach
it leaps back and keeps facts about my attempts a secret, even though it welcomes me to retrieve it,  
it likes the fact that i would die to feel the light apon my back i flap my wings and keep telling myself that i could be there
but i cant im on a trid mill runing after nirvana
on a loop filmed projected on a white cloth in front me,
i wanted it so bad i started tricking myself saying that the light chase the
moth when
it flickers i felt closer to me as my self as a black silkworm that grew up.
The same worm that thought of a purple light and threw up,
like i would never chase something so pointless now im here in her cold front searching for warmness im done its,
never gonna be like this sixteen is not enought is the beat that i feel in this expression,
i cant just
be your filler while you decide if this is
what you really want the lights in every city mah
and moths dont need to feed i could ride this out for many months or decades my head space is all i need no bandades
i dont often bleed.
Ive already adapted to slits, i hope someday your actually feel, and take this shit serious how real of us to come to a conclusion that were gonna be partners when you wont even call me your boyfriend it sucks right,
i see your options open how could i give my trust when its not even wanted. Im on a whole different spectrum were the old spirits dwell through the nebula expanding from a cellular point of veiw.
Im preparing for death with every step from new orleans to boston the black moth of hearts flew past me.
I stoped tryna catch it, i wanted to grasp it at one point id catch it and let it eacape it wouldn't have ever tried to leave if it entended to stay.