Bad Mushroom Trip - I met the devil

Many years ago...It was a nice November evening when I met the devil himself. About a month prior, I had dropped LSD for the first time. How did the saying go? Aw...that's right. Turn on, Tune in, Drop out. It was an amazing eye opening experience and I could not wait to try psilocybin mushrooms.

There were three of us, all good friends. Charlie (whose house we were at) and Johnny (who happened to sneak out of his house to be here). I would have to drive Johnny home before his father awoke in the morning (but we'll get into that later).

I don't remember what the time was, but it was getting late. Charlie's mom was fast asleep in her bedroom when we decided to take the shrooms. They tasted disgusting so we washed them down with some orange juice. We headed upstairs to Charlies room (which happened to be directly above his mothers). We had to skip the 4th and 6th step on the stairway or else it would creak and wake her up.

Charlie started playing some online video game. We were all just sitting around having a good time listening to the Beatles.

We began to feel the effects. The all too familiar feeling coming through in waves. I felt this one month ago, we were tripping. Harder and harder by the minute. Johnny said something funny and we all started laughing uncontrollably.

And then the door opened. A silhouetted figure, light shining from the hallway behind, stood in the doorway. "Can you guys please turn the music down? It's getting late." It was his mother. "Oh, hi Johnny. I didn't think you were coming over tonight."

"My father let me come over for a bit, but I have to leave early in the morning. We have a funeral to go to." Johnny replied.

She said, "Ok. Good night." and shut the door. Darkness followed.

"She knows! She knows what we did! She knows what we're doing! She knows we're tripping!" I screamed. I could picture her in my mind...standing there in the doorway accusing us.

"She has no idea, man. She was just telling us to turn the music down. Relax." Charlie said.

I was sure she knew. I was peaking now and we just got busted. This event set my mood for the rest of the night and so began my bad trip.

I was getting anxious. I had to drive Johnny home in a few minutes and I was peaking. We snuck downstairs and through the window (remembering to skipping the 6th and 4th step along the way). We approached the car, I opened the door and saw a mess. My mess. I was dirty, a slob. A burnout pothead with no life. I felt like shit.

Charlie sat beside me and Johnny in the back. We pulled out into the night, the only ones on the road at this hour. We came upon a stoplight and I needed to make a left turn. "Do I turn on red or green?" I asked Charlie as I was forgetting how to drive.

"Green. It's green you can turn." Further down the road we came upon a round a bout. It was a small one, but I noticed that it took forever to get through it. It seemed like it stretched on for miles and miles (even though it was only a 10 yards.)

I turn onto Johnny's street. I have been to his house many times, but tonight was different. Everything was different. Where is his house? "Tell me when to stop and I'll stop and you can get out. I forget where you live, Johnny."

He gets out of the car, I turn around and start driving away. I look at Charlie whose staring at me with his dilated pupils. "What do I do if a cop pulls me over? Do I run?"

"No man, you pull over." Somehow we made it back to Charlies house without crashing or getting pulled over. "You drove perfect, man." What the fuck?! In my mind I was all over the twisty turny road.

We sneak back upstairs (skipping the 4th and 6th step like professionals. I was getting good at this.) Charlie points to a spare bedroom, "That's where you'll sleep." The door was open. I could see nothing but darkness staring back. Death was in that room. I couldn't go. I couldn't go.

"I just have to use the bathroom first," I said, but I didn't have to use the bathroom. I just wanted to be with the light. I sat on his toilet, losing my sanity by the minute. I felt uncomfortable so I stood up and looked at myself in the mirror. Is that me peering back? Long greasy hair, black eyes, and a smile. That can't be me, but it was. A demonic look on my face. The waves that I could feel, the trip became painful. It hurt. I felt the urge to leave the bathroom so I open the door and step into the hallway.

The dark bedroom beckoning me to come in and get swallowed up, never to leave. I turn away from it and go to my friend's room. "I can't. I can't go in there! I'm scared!"

"It's okay, come hang out with me for a bit," replied Charlie. "Sit in that seat." I sat next to the television as he played video games and listened to music. This time... it was Ratatat.

Jackass was on the TV, I got lost in it. I was there! I was there... His head hit the ground and exploded. I shrieked and looked away. Standing in front of me was a tall man in a black cloak with a pumpkin for a head.

Charlie broke through and said, "Let's change the channel to something less trippy."

I pulled out my phone, the screensaver was an art project I had worked on after taking the LSD. Red hot fire, a bunny rabbit from Alice in Wonderland, and a word. A single word. One word that solidified what was going on around me. EVERYTHING was written down the left side.

Everything, everything... This is everything. Nothing else exists. I'm the only living thing on this planet, in the universe. I am god! And you are the devil. Life isn't real.

Remembering his mother in the doorway I sit up and ask the devil, do I have a mother too? Yes, you have a mom, you will see her tomorrow. I sit back, look at my phone, EVERYTHING, sit up and ask.. do I have a mother too? Yes. I sit back, look at my phone, EVERYTHING, sit up and ask.. do I have a mother too? This cycle went on for an hour.

I have no mom. I'm trapped in this room. My own personal hell. This is life, this is Everything. Sitting back and forth with the devil next to me. But I ate the apple. Everything, everything that I know, or thought I knew was a hallucination. Smoking weed was my escape. I have no mom. I have nothing but this room. My perception became my reality...

Charlie took my phone. He was afraid that I'd call my mother. My mom that didn't exist. My mom the trick of this devil. I ate the apple, the forbidden fruit. FUCK! FUCK! FUCK!

I moved to the devils bed. The painful waves flowing, ebbing through my brain. The room changed. There were four beds, 4 people. All of us laying back and sitting up, laying back and sitting up, back and up, back and up. They had no face.

The room shrunk, I was back with the devil. He was still playing his games. His body contorting in terrifying ways. I couldn't look at anything, but yet I saw EVERYTHING. Paid programming on the TV now. Trying to sell me jewelry. Jewelry that hung from a black long pole. Rings, necklaces, rings necklaces, everything, everything EVERYTHING!

I was stuck, stuck in this cycle. The room changed, I was going down a dark tunnel floating on a bed. I look down, taking off my pants. WTF! I pull them up, then down, up then down. The devil has his back to me and doesn't notice.

I was stuck insane for a few hours, but it felt like forever. It was EVERYTHING.

I come to a conclusion. There's only one way out. Only one way to end EVERYTHING. I took my belt off and held it in my hands. If this is life... then I don't want to live it. I have no mom, I ate the apple, the devils here and this is the only thing that exists. This one room. Suicide, SUICIDE, SUICIDE!

The lighting changed. The devil stood over me, take this. It will make you sleep. DEATH! Sleep is death! It's a trick! I was to afraid to object so I swallowed the death pill.

The devil laid down in bed. When he's asleep, I'll try to escape this room, this house. I'll go home. I'll tell my mom I'm sorry. I'll tell her EVERYTHING. She'll understand. Darkness took over before I could escape.

I woke up in the morning feeling nauseous. Ill from last night. What happened? I have memories that haunt me to this day of dark terrifying things. Memories of the impossible. Memories of hell.

I've never taken shrooms since, but sometimes, some things trigger the memories to come back. Memories from that horrifying night...the night I met the devil.