journey of transition

I wish I could remember the time
when we were distant friends
living in different lands
and when I thought of you
it only brought happiness
instead of this conflicting
emotion of daring
to think of you as…

what?

A dear friend?
Maybe…
up until the point
when I need a favour
or when I need
for you to listen
can’t you just see
that I am giving all
and you are giving nothing.

maybe you do?
maybe I just see you as…

opposite.
You’re dominate
you know what you want
and when I’m just floating around
you ground me
you’re driven and
sociable
but then we both
have this spontaneous side
that loves the outdoors
and bettering the world
and so I think maybe…

You’re better version
of who I could be
a more motivated
constant and consistent creator
who needs no one
to show him a better way
because you’ve made your own
but then on the nights
you call me drunk
and alone
I can’t help but think…

You need me
so I don’t feel as guilty
for needing you
But i keep my distance
incase these drunken
whispers
have no truth
and I’m afraid
because once the alcohol
flows out of your veins
you don’t say the same things
and so I’m left wondering
a little farther into knowing…


could you be
up the road
a joint part of my soul
or will the future
bring back the past..
we are distant friends
from different lands
that memories only bring...

What?