Reminders

I've lost my way in a life of untold letdowns. 

Spite, 
Love, 
Lust , 
Loathe 

Feelings that mean absolutely nothing now, 
but then, what does anymore? 

Suicide, 
Fear, 
Destruction, 
Self mutilation, 

All words of freedom from the normality's of life. 
All the adrenaline junkies favorite hobbies. 

Time, 
Existence, 
Humanity, 

It all means absolutely nothing now. 

Companionship, 
a best friend, 
a lover 

Nothing but slicing blades of past pain, regret. 
You stray away from happy moments because even though their wonderfuly blissful and happily portrayed,
after their just a painful reminder of what was and what never will be again.

Loneliness,
Angst,
Gratitude,

The only thing you can count on in this mind fucking world is your own personal tunnel of never ending despair and nothingness. 
I don't mind falling into the black abyss of my mind, 
so the chaos of my own devices will grow.