deepundergroundpoetry.com
Names
You are a filthy liar.
You are the world's evil.
You are worthless.
You are a whore.
You are a slut.
You are a faggot.
You are a disappointment.
Hello, My name is
all of the above.
You are no better.
I am you.
For I am your 'dummy',
that you pose your own names upon.
For I am garbage.
For I have no feeling.
For I am everything you 'have been'
We are all of the above.
You are the world's evil.
You are worthless.
You are a whore.
You are a slut.
You are a faggot.
You are a disappointment.
Hello, My name is
all of the above.
You are no better.
I am you.
For I am your 'dummy',
that you pose your own names upon.
For I am garbage.
For I have no feeling.
For I am everything you 'have been'
We are all of the above.
Published 21st Mar 2016
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The author encourages honest critique.
21st Mar 2016 10:20pm
that's right. let no one else define you or limit your ability to soar. and don't be afraid to meet insult with retort. to hell with meekness
22nd Mar 2016 1:53am
I like the mood you set for the poem, but I think that it's a bit clichè. The effort seems unapparent and that it was just spewing out insults that affected you. I feel as though it's less a poem and more a simple statement. I recommend you use more metaphors and symbols to represent something other than literal statements. Figurative language. For example, "He was the apple of her eye" (A favorite of mine). Instead of saying "He was the man she loved," it turns it into a nonliteral statement. I think you could try that out. :)
22nd Mar 2016 3:29am
Thanks for the input! I'll try my hardest to incorporate it into my new poems :3
