old scars

this is the best  fight of my life
I just apologized
she stood there like blood hit the wall
stunned shocked confused crying and all
she just came to me
I held her
she sobbed violently
embracing me and my apology  
baby I'm sorry im me
no hush baby I love you
your just stupid sometimes
I don't wanna lose you
one day you won't come back to me
I hold her close and breath silently
whats with me
I hold pure love in my arms
and I still hustle theses streets
risking the only thing she wants
me
simply
I tell her it's all gonna be fine
it's a lie
I cry inside as I speak it
but I cant break her heart anymore
I walk in the next room and close the door
I'm bleeding I didn't want her to see
some junkie punk stabbed me for a 20
I'm trying to stitch it up before she sees's
fuck no sex for me
until I think of some  another story
another lie
i have to
i cant watch her cry