To be me

A writer doesn't sit in darkness and wonder what to say next
Just as a lover doesn't have trouble keeping themselves from feeling hate toward another
Because to be a writer, you must always have something to say
To be a lover, you must always love
I have thus come to the conclusion that to be me
Means to constantly hide in fear that you'll never be good enough
To second guess your decisions, actions, words
To be me means to joke so lightly about how alone you're always going to be
But it's only a joke to everyone else
To be me is to wish to be anyone else but myself
And while everyone thinks that I am strong
Or that I am confident
They don't know that to be me means to put on a mask and cast a line deep into myself
Fishing for the slightest amount of strength to keep moving through the day
A writer knows that they're a writer
A lover knows that they're a lover
And I know that if I was to be myself around people
Everyone else probably wouldn't exist