Two years too late

From nothing
A word pierces the night
Like a cold shower on a hot day
Refreshing but not timely
My aching heart, a muscle scorned
Beating with power
Learning to feel again
Hopes and dreams shattered like glass
Put back together
To create a new meaning
Strength from weakness
Built on shoulders slouched by weight
A crack forms only to heal slowly
Will I ever hear her voice again?
So sweet in a jersey accent
Each syllable falling off the tongue
In rhythm with the teeth
A conversation never had
A regret so heavy it haunts me still
Too much time wasted
A love neglected
I'm so sorry sugar
For my lack of words
At a time when we should've talked
About how I hurt you
Stole your virginity with a lie
No amount of tears
Or promises could ever take back
My infidelity or the strain of my guilty state
But I'm a better man now
Growing up, no longer a boy
Drugs, money, sex
These things mean nothing to me
What I don't have anymore
Is what I really crave
I try to numb the sorrow
But comfort is only momentary
The choices I made
Now a burden because I've lost
The only one I ever truly loved
Your voice
Not just a memory
But the thing reverberating through my head
It's the happiness you gave
That set me free
But these chains that hold me now
Were put there by my own doing
Don't forgive me
I wasn't deserving of your loyalty
What I need is a cure
To this loneliness that tortures me so
If only I wasn't two years too late
Then maybe the pain
Wouldn't be too great
I can never say goodbye
And you can never be replaced
But I was stupid to think
We'd have a fairy tale ending
Now all that's left are my mistakes