deepundergroundpoetry.com
I Got An Ass Whooping From Jesus For Christmas
I didn't get shit for Christmas.
Jesus was pissed: you been naughty.
I said: the world ain't nice.
So. Do what I did. Turn the other cheek.
I told Jesus: Fuck You. And fuck the other cheek.
Jesus replied: I'll be seeing you in your sleep.
Shit, Jesus is gonna whoop my ass.
I got an ass whooping from Jesus on Christmas.
The same ass whooping he got from the Romans.
Why you do this to me Jesus? I pleaded.
Jesus said: What comes around, goes around.
I said: Fuck You.
and Jesus dropped kicked me.
Jesus was pissed: you been naughty.
I said: the world ain't nice.
So. Do what I did. Turn the other cheek.
I told Jesus: Fuck You. And fuck the other cheek.
Jesus replied: I'll be seeing you in your sleep.
Shit, Jesus is gonna whoop my ass.
I got an ass whooping from Jesus on Christmas.
The same ass whooping he got from the Romans.
Why you do this to me Jesus? I pleaded.
Jesus said: What comes around, goes around.
I said: Fuck You.
and Jesus dropped kicked me.
Published 7th Dec 2015
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
likes 3
reading list entries 0
comments 2
reads 994
Commenting Preference:
The author encourages honest critique.
7th Dec 2015 4:03pm
Lol I loved this...this was of great humor.to think Jesus would drop kick you ...you'd end up past eternity to get suck a powerful kick....Jesus himself would have to come find you after that. Great write...I enjoyed this !!
9th Dec 2015 5:08pm
