I wonder what it's like

As I sit today, stranded from the person I feel within
Not even a lifeboat could reach me.
I’m sat on my own island surrounded by hostile waters and unfamiliar scenery
Not even a lifeboat could reach me.

I sit today, I await my rescue, I long to be reunited with normality
I am my own lifeboat.
And as I await my rescue, I sit and I think, what is normality?

I wonder what it’s like to live in a city where people never sleep,
I wonder what it’s like to be stood on the top of Everest, where the bravest souls weep
I wonder what it’s like to watch your children grow up right before your eyes,
I wonder what it’s like to lay in a bed with a partner you truly despise.

There is a light in the distance, my rescue awaits.
But the skies are darkening and a storm is coming and the waves are thundering around me

I wonder what it’s like to wake up in the morning and look forward to the day,
I wonder what it’s like to look at your body, bare and exposed and not feel revolted,
I wonder what it’s like to receive a message off your partner and not be drowned with anxiety,
I wonder what it’s like to love yourself, instead of spending every waking minute trying to change who you are.
I wonder what it’s like to eat a morsel of food and not dwell on the calories within.
I wonder what it’s like to feel love, instead of looking at people and feel emptiness.
I wonder what it’s like to be free of body issues in sex, so that instead of freezing in place, you are freed.

Maybe here, on this island, free from the pain of every day life, it is better for me. Alone. Baron.
But just as I begin to question that thought, there are hands on my shoulders.

My normal self pulling me up onto the lifeboat.

And I am rescued.