Philantia

I sit and watch love from afar.
I sit and stare at it until it ends.
As my desires take over and guard
My infatuation of my self depends.

O, I look to the ceiling and feel it all.
Like an empathic witch, I do much more.
For once, I'm not exactly at fault.
It's just nature at it's core.

I reach and take that moment.
A self-loving prude as I seem.
I can only feel it within atonement,
For now it is all on me.

I strum the cords of life
As I seek it within again.
Another night without my knife,
I am forbidden by the sin.

I let it build inside,
As I watch myself in the dark.
This magic is some I'll abide,
For I am sweet as I am tart.

I stop for a while
Just to let in the calm.
I play that song once and file;
Organize myself to play the wrong.

I return to my exercise.
Again, strumming the tone of the wild.
My mother would say I need to be exorcised,
But the devil within me is only mild.

For my heart is strong,
It is close to beat again.
I continue to play this song,
Like I have done all with wind.

I build and build
Only to release in time
It glistens and guild
So it begins to whine.

I told myself i wouldn't do this,
But my desire glows bright.
I explode with emotion like a fist.
I let it out in all the light.

It goes in every direction.
Feeling it release and land,
It has my reflection
Burning with the passion of sand.

I am impressed by my own.
Who knew it was in me.
My soft or silent tone
Becomes the loudest sea.

I could brag about this mess.
Cleaning it up will be a bother,
But I've released that stress.
I guess I'll confess to the father.