I woke up

I woke up at my grandma's place    
while she was chanting 'what a waste'  
I had been sleeping two days in a row    
how I managed that, I still don't know.    
   
I woke up on a toilet seat    
covered by blood, smelled like shit    
I said 'I'm okey just let me go'    
the reason I live must not be ignored  
   
I woke up and thought of death    
asking of my lifetime's length    
I was almost dead and my ressurection    
was a fucking instant, daily injection.    
   
I woke up and hate them all    
I had no purpose, I had no goal    
I saw myself pale in the mirror    
drowning in a waterless seashore    
   
I woke up and admired the sky    
wondering who the fuck am I?    
And then I realized my meaning    
If only I could say I'm dreaming..    
   
My lack of awareness have cost me a lot
Bleeding wounds that some stitched wrong
Wounds on my arms, my heart, my feet    
To cure them all I need some sleep