When relationships die

when I don't pick up the phone,
It's not because I don't want to talk,
I'm only afraid to run out of things to talk about.

When I don't hug you when you apologize,
It's not because I can't forgive you,
I'm only afraid it will lead to another apology.

When I don't kiss you when you say goodbye,
It's not because I don't want to show affection,
I'm only afraid affection will soon run dry.

When I don't want to meet you,
It's not because I don't want to see you,
I'm only afraid of seeing you differently.

When I don't think we should be together,
It's not because I don't want to be with you,
I'm only afraid I can't.

When I don't want to be the one to end it,
It's not because I want to put the blame on you,
I'm only afraid to hurt you if I do it myself.

Knowing I'd handle it with more control,
If you were the one to mutter it all.

When I don't want to hold your hand,
It's not because I'm unwilling to touch you,
I'm only afraid your hand might not fit into mine.

When I don't want to wear your presents,
It's not because I don't appreciate them,
I'm only afraid they'll turn to just another thing.

When I don't feel like saying I love you,
It's not because I don't,
I just don't want the words to mean nothing.