Missing Then: Missing Now

I wish i could remember
Every word you said
That told me shit
Every little dribble
Kept mounding up
So i chose to quit
Doesn't really matter
Mother fucker
This is over and done
We played the game you made
Now I hope you're happy
For you've won
Because my bleeding irises
Will bleed out tears
Instead of blood
I'll see your grasp around me
Trying to pull me down
Beneath the mud
My irises will also see
A sense of this
That came with cost
The truth lied in the aftermath
When you realized
How much you lost
Lost your greatest lover
Somewhere back;
While we were growing older
When you were fixed on "future"
I tried to brush you
From my shoulder
I couldn't take the fact
That what I had
Was a controlling bitch
Just hearing your fucking voice
Would make me tweak, and twitch,
And fucking itch
Could no longer live
Inside a shell
Where another's pulling strings
Could no longer be your puppet
Got too fed up
With oh...everything!
Things now that i cannot
Nor I will not
Tell this very day
Cause telling is becoming
What you are
In every fucking way
Spreading out your lips
To speak a language
That you can't control
The reason for turning away
And withdrawing my love
Away from your soul
And that "missing piece" you're looking for
Is something I hope
For you to see
If you'd just open
Your beautiful blinded eyes
You'd realize it's me.