deepundergroundpoetry.com
what u said
tonight the razor that cuts me so deep. shall bed laid by my bed. but right in arms reach. just in case i rembered what you said...so now i die
Published 23rd Jan 2015
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The author encourages honest critique.
23rd Jan 2015 3:44pm
I like this.. it's dark and gritty.
Just a little advice,
You could use more words as to explain how deep or what color, how the blood flows etc.
Either way it had me frozen to the bone to the point where i had to keep reading.
Just a little advice,
You could use more words as to explain how deep or what color, how the blood flows etc.
Either way it had me frozen to the bone to the point where i had to keep reading.
23rd Jan 2015 3:59pm
