Trigger

I've got my finger on the trigger of a loaded gun
Thinking this day could be the one
The one where I end it all
And watch as the darkness begins to fall

There's no one to take the bullets out
No one to save me, as the revolver spins about
This is my fault, I dug my own grave
I'm getting back what I gave

I wish I had known that the signs were on the wall
Written in blood  to be seen by all
But I was so blind
And didn't know to leave you behind

My finger on the trigger, ready to pull
The voices screaming endlessly in my skull
Memories flying through my mind
Too fast for me to rewind

I slowly put the gun to my chest
Thinking of how nice it will be to finally rest
My pulse is pounding in my ears
My body is shaking, my eyes brimming with tears

How could I do this?
Am I sure I'm someone no one will miss?
What will my mother think?
Her only daughter gone in a blink

The gun falls to the floor
I lost my nerve, and I'm shaken to the core
I can't do this, and risk breaking someones heart
I won't be the one to tear my family apart