I Have Grown

I sit and look down upon old writings. When time was dark, mind was fogged, life in shambles. I laugh and cry, cringe and recall. I had given up on what made me human; what made me who I am. Relinquished my grasp on reality...to a monster within me.

I am now over a year free of the monster that overcame my being. I am able to sit comfortably, think clearly, and most of all, smile. I love who I am again. No more shadows or hiding behind tinfoil. I crave the sun once more.

The love that picked me up from the depths is no longer a love. Rather, a memory. No, not a fond memory; nor a dark one. Simply a memory. I ponder what would have became of me, had it not been for that hand. But that is where it ends.

I cannot change the past, only learn and grow. I have learned a plethora about myself; grown into an adult. I know I have left pain and sorrow in my wake. Alas, I can do nothing.

Instead, my head I shall hold high; my scars are to be worn proudly. No longer ashamed, I feel reborn. There is not a substance on this rock, I now rely on.

                   ~~~~~~~~~~~<3~~~~~~~~~~~~~

  Love.
     It is all I need.

              I had scorned my past memory of love; vowed to do this on my own.


         Then, he strolled in, took my hand, and reminded me I didn't have to.
   I did not fall in love again, you see.
     No.
 I held his hand and together, we walked into the warmth, side by side.

I conquered my demon on my own, yes.
   Now, I shan't be alone any longer.
       Nor is there a thread within myself that cares to do so.

Once more, I have found love; love has found me.
Everyday we clime a bit higher,
  we hold on a tad tighter,
     and savor our time a trace deeper.

We Have Grown