unwilling to live

The pain is just too much to bear.
I don't feel like living anymore.
I feel like everyone seems to stare.
All I want is to settle the score.

Too many nights I have wished I'd have died.
Too many nights I have laid there and cried.
What is this feeling that I have inside?
Why do I want to go run and hide?

Is there something wrong with me?
Why am I in such misery?
Why can't I get these thoughts out of my head?
Why am I wishing that I was dead?

It's because of the pain that won't go away.
Because of the aches I feel every day.
It's too much to tolerate.
All I want to do is find an escape.

So maybe this time I will have the courage
To take the blade and cut my vein
A little deeper this time
Maybe then I could end all this pain.