deepundergroundpoetry.com
Sat8Nov14
Saskatoon saw snow Saturday.
Might melt, mid May.
Why will we wait?
Because being bred bold,
crazy canucks can contend.
People please ponder. perhaps
things that take time,
like limp lost leaves.
finally fall. Frozen. Forgotten.
Until under umpteen undulating
drifts. deepening desires develop.
Allowing anticipated actions access
into intimacy. If it
requires real rationalization, right
harmonious homes happen. Heed,
gratitude gloriously given generates
everything, even entire entities.
Once one opts, often,
nobody needs nothing new.
Just jack-jill jovially.
Kindly keeping ken king.
Quashing quarrels quite quickly,
via vibrantly vernal Valhalla.
Yield ye yule YAHOO!
Might melt, mid May.
Why will we wait?
Because being bred bold,
crazy canucks can contend.
People please ponder. perhaps
things that take time,
like limp lost leaves.
finally fall. Frozen. Forgotten.
Until under umpteen undulating
drifts. deepening desires develop.
Allowing anticipated actions access
into intimacy. If it
requires real rationalization, right
harmonious homes happen. Heed,
gratitude gloriously given generates
everything, even entire entities.
Once one opts, often,
nobody needs nothing new.
Just jack-jill jovially.
Kindly keeping ken king.
Quashing quarrels quite quickly,
via vibrantly vernal Valhalla.
Yield ye yule YAHOO!
Published 10th Nov 2014
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
likes 0
reading list entries 0
comments 2
reads 599
Commenting Preference:
The author encourages honest critique.
10th Nov 2014 7:24am
You've omitted X and Z! I suppose xenophobic xylophones zealously zapping zany zanzes is pushing the envelope a bit.
It's very clever, and I must admit, the first few lines were so well done, that I did not even spot the pattern until line 5 or 6. The beginning was effective, loved the laconic 'Might melt, mid May', but then you struck the problem with all such ideas, and it became increasingly desperate and lost meaning. A brave and original attempt. I'm sure that you know that someone once wrote an entire novel from which the letter e was totally absent. Not quite sure why. Or should that be 'I am sort of doubtful as to why'
It's very clever, and I must admit, the first few lines were so well done, that I did not even spot the pattern until line 5 or 6. The beginning was effective, loved the laconic 'Might melt, mid May', but then you struck the problem with all such ideas, and it became increasingly desperate and lost meaning. A brave and original attempt. I'm sure that you know that someone once wrote an entire novel from which the letter e was totally absent. Not quite sure why. Or should that be 'I am sort of doubtful as to why'
10th Nov 2014 1:05pm
Cool comment. Ya, this was kind of tough. I'm not even sure I like it. Thank you for reading, and the criticism.
