deepundergroundpoetry.com
Broken
My heart has been broken.
So far beyond repair.
My heart of glass
Shatters into little pieces
Why must it be so painful
Why must I have to hurt
I hurt all the time
it never stops
I cant take it anymore
I cry and plea for relief
But I just can't get it
Im tired of crying
Crying myself to sleep
When will it come
When will happiness come
I hope it's soon.
I can't handle anymore
So far beyond repair.
My heart of glass
Shatters into little pieces
Why must it be so painful
Why must I have to hurt
I hurt all the time
it never stops
I cant take it anymore
I cry and plea for relief
But I just can't get it
Im tired of crying
Crying myself to sleep
When will it come
When will happiness come
I hope it's soon.
I can't handle anymore
Published 31st Aug 2014
| Edited 4th Sep 2014
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likes 2
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comments 4
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Commenting Preference:
The author encourages honest critique.
31st Aug 2014 6:49pm
A poignant write, so deeply emotional and relatable to many. Since you asked for honest critique, let me give you my 2 cents:
My heart has been broke. [should be "broken" instead of broke]
"Shattered into little pieces" [you're writing in the present, so it must be: Shatters into little pieces]
Also the use of contraction/apostrophe:
cant [can't]
its [it's, meaning it is]
Good piece brandon...write on!
@EngrVV
My heart has been broke. [should be "broken" instead of broke]
"Shattered into little pieces" [you're writing in the present, so it must be: Shatters into little pieces]
Also the use of contraction/apostrophe:
cant [can't]
its [it's, meaning it is]
Good piece brandon...write on!
@EngrVV
31st Aug 2014 11:39pm
Thank you for your input. First mistake was a typo. And glad you noticed the second error
31st Aug 2014 7:13pm
1st Sep 2014 5:49pm
